


learning the ropes

by watergator



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, Kink Exploration, Light BDSM, M/M, safe word
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:07:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22186084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watergator/pseuds/watergator
Summary: dan and phil try something new together
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 8
Kudos: 96
Collections: Jestbee's Birthday Fics 2020





	learning the ropes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jestbee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jestbee/gifts).



It’s less of an on instinct, heat of the moment thing, and more of a slow burn idea that summers inside Dan’s mind, building and building until the idea is red hot, bubbling over and he knows he has to ask Phil.

They’re in bed. The covers are pulled up under their armpits; it’s cold out and the heating only does so much in the apartment and whilst Dan has been mindlessly scrolling through his phone whilst he tries to map out the conversation he wants to start, Phil has his nose in one of his new books his dad had recommended to him. 

Dan lets his phone drop down into his lap when he looks at Phil, his glasses perched on the tip of his bird nose and his squirrely hair is messy and floppy from where he’d stepped out of the shower just an hour ago, void of any fancy products that usually kept it in its amazing quiff shape.

“Phil?” Dan asks.

Phil doesn’t even look up, eyes flickering over the screen as he makes a grunting sound, something tangible as recognition that Dan is even talking to him.

Dan rolls his eyes even if Phil can’t see it.

“Phil,” he says, a little more punch to his tone this time.

And it seems to work as Phil looks up from his book, pushing his glasses up with a finger and frowning through them to look at him.

“What?” He says, voice low and sleepy sounding.

Dan’s eyes flicker over his face; there’s a slight orange haze from where their lamps are glowing each side of the room. The light bounces across his features, highlighting the bumps of his cheekbones in a rather flattering way.

Dan swallows thickly as Phil looks at him expectantly.

“I, uh, I was doing some thinking,” he starts and Phil makes a snorting sound, folding the corner of his page and setting his book into his lap.

“Uh oh,” he teases. “That’s dangerous.”

Dan tries to look put out, but it fails because he can’t help his lips from twitching into a smile which only makes Phil smile too, clearly pleased with himself.

“Shut up,” Dan scoffs. “This is serious.”

Phil raises his brows. “You’re pregnant?” He guesses and Dan furrows his brows before he realises Phil’s teasing him still. “Or is it a proposal?” He adds. “Because I think I’d prefer to finish my chapter before you pull out any kind of ring…” he says, trailing off as he waves his book in the air.

Dan tuts and he reaches over and takes the book from his hand and places it on his bedside where it’s out of reach.

“Phil,” he says with a half laugh. “Just. Listen to me, please?”

Phil’s shoulders relax and the devilish look he has drops from his face in turn of something more sincere.

“Alright,” he says softly. “I’m listening.”

Dan smiles at him and Phil smiles back. 

“Right,” Dan says and he suddenly feels very nervous. He doesn’t even know why, it’s  _ Phil _ . The same Phil he’s known and loved for the last ten years, and the same Phil he’s so far had no real trouble talking to.

His fingers find the edge of the sheets, pulling and playing with a loose thread when he looks back up at Phil who’s patient as ever.

“It’s a sex thing,” he blurts out. “Just so you know.”

Phil watches him before he shifts back in his seat and looks at Dan with a grin.

“Go on then,” he prompts him.

Dan swallows thickly.

It’s just Phil, he reminds himself.

“I was thinking the other day,” Dan starts. He avoids looking at Phil dead in the eye only because if feels earlier to talk to him about it all if he’s sure Phil isn’t going to start laughing at him if he can’t see his face.

“And I got myself into like, a spiral,” he says with a wave of his hand, “about how good we are together.”

He looks up at Phil then. 

“Yeah,” Phil agrees with a nod. “I think so.”

Dan smiles.

“Anyway. I was reading something. About us, which I know you hate,” Dan says, watching Phil’s lips purse together.

“And you remember that… old photo?” Dan adds on quickly before Phil can even think of opening his mouth. “The one with you, on dailybooth, the one with the belt?”

Phil has to think for a moment, his brows furrow in concentration as he tries to remember all whilst Dan has the clearest image in his mind of the exact photo; a younger Phil with shaggy black hair rounding his face, eyes a stark and bright blue and a belt covering half his face.

“I think I know the one,” Phil says slowly, as if the memory is coming back to him now. He’s still looking a tad confused though like he has no idea where the conversation is headed.

“Well do you remember how back then we’d make jokes about…” he pauses for a moment.

“We’d make jokes about tying ourselves up and, well, y’know,” he finishes with a shrug.

He watches the bob of his Adam’s apple in his throat as he swallows, eyes flickering back up to meet his.

“Yeah,” Phil croaks. “But we never did because we didn’t really feel like we needed that stuff to get us going,” he reminds him. “I mean, literally all you had to do was  _ breathe  _ next to my dick and I’d already be falling apart.”

Dan laughs, his shoulder shake just a little at the memory of how pliant and wound up they used to be. He’s reminded of his eighteen year old self, having all the ideas in the world, a knowledge full of porn and stories that he wanted to try out with Phil, but neither had the confidence or patience to follow through on. And instead of trying new things, they became comfortable with the things they knew they liked now.

Like how they preferred fucking in missionary style because sometimes being on your all fours did a number on their joints, or that whilst riding dick was incredible fun, their stamina wasn’t enough to get them off from doing it, and it usually resulted in one flipping the other over onto their back and finishing off that way.

They were perfectly vanilla with their slow and easy sex; the towel laid down for sex that was no longer spontaneous or fast anymore. They used condoms more often for the sake of not having the clean up anymore, instead of the way they used to enjoy mess.

Things had shifted into something more complacent with time and age, and whilst that was good for Dan, sometimes he craves the things he feels like he may have missed out.

“Are you asking me to spank your bum and like... do  _ that  _ kind of stuff to you?” Phil asks, his voice edges on concern just lightly and Dan is snapped back out of his thoughts with a shake of his head.

“No,” he says quickly. “I don’t think so,” he then adds on.

Phil’s face changes as he seemingly tries to understand and process what’s happening.

“So you want us to be more… kinky, is that it?”

Dan swallows thickly. It’s not the entire truth, but it’s not really a lie either, he’s just not sure how to word it and make the feelings in his head come out of his mouth and into something tangible and understandable.

He sighs heavily as he tries to collect his thoughts when he feels Phil’s hand come over his to clasp it gently.

“Hey,” he says softly, making Dan look up to face him. 

“Just, explain it to me in Dan-words,” he tells him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking and I’ll do my best to understand.”

Dan swallows hard and nods. “Okay,” he croaks. “I can do that.”

He spends a good amount of time explaining to Phil that whilst he knows that the sex life they have now is good and fun and enjoyable, he tells him about how sometimes he wants to dip his toe into other ideas. He’s not plunging himself into the deep end - not even the baby pool of ideas yet, but he simply wants a feel for what else is out there, and whether it may spur him on to try bigger and better things.

But he obviously needs Phil to say yes too. He only wants to do this with him, and if Phil says no, then it’s a no from him too.

By the end of the conversation Dan feels worked up and anxious and like his brain is nothing but tangled spaghetti in his head.

But Phil leans over from his side of the bed and kisses him on the nose and smiles at him.

“I’m beings stupid,” Dan mutters.

“Don’t call my boyfriend stupid, stupid,” Phil teases him.

It earns him a small smile at least.

“So you’ll try it then?” Dan asks and Phil’s smile doesn’t falter as he nods.

“Sure. Can’t be no harm,” he shrugs. “Do you have the stuff?”

They’re slipping under the covers now, laying down side by side as Phil reaches with an arm and turns off his lamp.

“Not yet,” Dan says between a yawn. “Was hoping maybe you could help me tomorrow.”

Dan turns his own lamp off and the room is shrouded in darkness.

He hears a ruffle of the sheets and soon Phil’s presses up against his side, his nose buried into his shoulder as he hums, sleepily and lovingly.

“Of course,” he whispers slowly. “Now get some rest, yeah?”

Dan turns his head to kiss him quickly on the forehead.

“Night,” he whispers.

All he gets is a low, sleepy grunt from Phil in response.

Dan smiles to himself. It’s enough though.

*

It takes a little while for anything to actually change.

It’s not something expected overnight, but as soon as the things they need are bought, and the packages are arriving at their door, Dan can’t help the squirm of excitement that he feels in his stomach every time he passes the box sat on the kitchen table, just waiting to be opened and used.

It’s not spontaneous. They talk one evening of when they’re gonna use it and how they’re gonna do it and a whole conversation comes into play before they’re putting into practice. The decide on tonight to be the night and Dan spends the entire day waiting for bedtime to roll around, feeling his heart rate spike inside his chest every time it crosses his mind as to what they’re trying out tonight.

Phil seems the same way, growing impatient at the smallest of things. They do the dishes together after dinner and even then he seems hurried along to get them finished so they can go to bed.

If feels like a goddamn victory when they’re finally there, stripped down in their pants, it feels like electricity humming under his skin.

Dan is on his stomach; it’s nothing entirely new when it comes to sex, but it’s far from familiar. It’s not always a position they prefer, and only usually happens when they’re rolling around and messing about.

But this time Dan’s laying face down with purpose, his arms stretched behind him and his knees bent and his feet in the air.

He feels nervousness drum against his chest for a moment when he feels Phil’s gentle hands skim up his forearm and his hand wraps around his wrist with such ease and trust it makes Dan’s heart calm, and flutter with love.

“Gonna use the rope now, okay?” Phil says in a low whisper.

They’d agreed beforehand that every act leading up to the main thing they were trying to achieve would be verbally confirmed.

Dan swallows some of the saliva in his mouth and hums. 

“Okay,” he tells him and with that he feels the rope start to bind his wrists and ankles together until they’re secure and his limbs are suspended behind his back.

It takes some time for Phil to make sure they’re right. He fails a few times, curses under his breath as the rope slips but he gets it eventually, and the bed dips away as Dan imagines Phil sitting back to admire his work.

Dan sucks in a shaky breath. It feels strange to be tied up like this, his arms and legs suspended and stuck in one position.

It’s strange but it’s also not terrible.

He hears Phil also take a breath and suddenly there’s a hand on his back. Phil’s palm is a little warm and sweaty, and he causes shivers to run down his spine as the drags a fingertip down it, his nail scrapes light across his skin.

Dan shudders under the touch. He can’t really see much; his head is turned to the side but he has his eyes closed. The mask they’d bought hadn’t arrived after a stupid delivery mix up but it didn’t matter to Dan all that much. 

“You remember the safe… word thingy?” Phil asks, sounding unsure of himself even.

Dan chuckles lowly as he hears rustling behind him.

“It’s more of a safe  _ action _ I think,” he muses.

It’s then that Phil’s walking towards him in his knees.

The angle he’s stuck in doesn’t give him much of a chance to get a good look at the man kneeling above him.

He feels his mouth pull into a smile when he does however manage to see the light bounce off the object in Phil’s hands.

“Want it on now?” Phil simply asks.

Dan nods. “Yeah. Two clicks to stop?” He asks as he lifts his head up, craning his neck slightly.

“Uh huh,” Phil says as he fiddles with the device before he’s reaching down and placing it over Dan’s head with care.

The ball gag feels strange at first, the plastic flavour bursts on his tongue and at first he does to complain, make a joke, before he realises he can’t.

He looks up at Phil who’s got a worrisome look plastered on his face. 

“Alright?” He asks.

Dan nods as he tries to get used to the heavy feeling of something big in his mouth… not that it’s too much of a different to what he’s already used to when it comes to their sex life.

He doesn’t even realise that Phil has moved back behind him until he feels two warm hands on the bottom of his back. 

“I uh, I’m gonna take your pants off now,” Phil says, his voice is a little awkward and stiff and Dan remains still as Phil tries to pull them off his body.

Halfway through the struggle Dan is wondering why the hell they didn't do this before they used the rope, but he eventually manages to get them down to his knees which is enough as they both catch their breaths from the workout the just endured just from having to get Dan’s pants off his butt.

Dan wants to laugh, but reminds himself of the immersion, and the effort they’re putting into this, no matter how many times they fuck up.

He feels familiar hands squeeze at his ass cheeks.

“Gonna work you open now,” Phil says, voice a little gravelly as he massages at the soft give of his flesh.

Dan closes his eyes and tries to focus on the little things happening around him.

The pop of the lube cap echoes inside his head and he can just about smell the chemically manufactured fake fruit smell. He pictures the way Phil enjoys rubbing it across his fingers, warming it up.

There’s a moment of stillness where Dan wonders if maybe Phil’s stopped for whatever reason, and so he’s taken off guard when he feels a wetness touch at his rim, making him shiver.

“You okay?” Phil asks. His finger is still rubbing over him, making circles around his hole that he can feel start to flutter under the touch as to what’s to come.

Dan hums and nods, desperate for Phil to get on with it already. He’s already half hard, dick trapped between his stomach and the bedsheets he’s sure he’s going to ruin. They hadn’t even put a towel down just for the sake of being different tonight, even if it meant having to do a washing load later tonight.

But Dan’s not trying to think about laundry when Phil is pushing a finger into him and he groans, muffled by the ball gag in his mouth.

The pillow is damp under his face as spit dribbles out past his lips. It feels sticky and gross and he tries to focus on the feeling of Phil’s finger dragging in and out in shallow motions.

“Good?” Phil asks.

Dan hums quickly. It feels like it always feels when Phil fingers him: fantastic.

Phil pulls all the right moves, moving his finger in and out until he’s adding a second when he knows that Dan’s ready without even having to ask. He scissors him open, stretching him and prepping him ready.

It feels so amazing to feel the drag of his finger against his inner walls, feeling his hole suck and push greedily to get him to move in all the right places.

It’s then that the fingertip of Phil’s forefinger brushes against his prostate that he isn’t so sure.

He feels it zap through his veins like a burst of energy, a feeling of immense pleasure. Phil must get the idea as he begins to tap against it with more purpose. He won’t make Dan come like this but he’ll sure as hell enjoy it for as long as he can. 

Dan tries to move his hips to give into the feeling, but because of the rope restricting him, it becomes more difficult to do so. He’s only able to wiggle just a fraction of what he’d prefer, and when he tries on each stroke of Phil’s finger, he feels the frustration build up more and more.

He grunts, at least as much as he can with the ball gag stuffed in his mouth, and he thinks about when he usually get inpatient and whiny they usually end up laughing and Phil teases him for it and he gets what it is he wants.

Phil continues to go slow, fingertips pressing against him that start of hot fireworks crackle in his belly, and he once again tries to move but he can’t.

He suddenly becomes aware in that very moment; aware of how his shoulders burn and his knees are starting to ache from the position they’re bent up in.

The rope is starting to dig into his skin and although the website said it was ropeburn safe, it still isn’t as soft and as giving as he once thought it would be.

Dan feels too trapped, too restrained and too far detached from what he knows he feels comfortable with.

Phil’s moving his fingers with speed now and any other time it’d mean that he’s almost ready to take his cock now, but Dan decides there and then he wants out, and with two quick snaps of his fingers Phil’s stopping, finger half in, half out.

“You okay?” Phil asks carefully. His voice is so gentle and loving and it makes Dan want to cry.

He shakes his head. He wants the bloody gag out of his mouth as he hums something low and croaky around it.

Phil’s fingers slip out of him slowly and he hears Phil wipe them across the sheets before he’s shuffling up towards the head of the bed.

Phil touches the strap of the ball gag. “Off?” He asks.

Dan nods and that’s all it takes for Phil to undo the buckle and it’s falling from him.

Dan’s jaw aches after the loss, the corners of his lips feel stretched and sore and he licks at his lips now that the feel cracked and dry.

“Ropes?” Phil is asking. Dan’s still stuck on his stomach and right now his only view of Phil is just his crotch. He’s only half hard but it makes Dan want to crawl away and hide. He nods.

“Yeah. Can you let me go, please?”

His own voice sounds raspy and broken inside his own head, and Phil doesn’t hesitate to move around him and make an attempt to undo them.

He curses again, much like he had when he was applying them earlier, and each tug and fail only makes Dan feel more desperate to get free.

It doesn’t take that long to finally get the rope to get loose enough so slip over his hands and feet as he limbs flop against the bed like a poor, dead fish.

There’s silence for a moment as Phil packs away the rope and the gag and Dan is slow to roll over and tuck his knees to his chest.

He’s being handed his discarded pants from Phil and he mutters a small thank you before he’s shoving his legs through the holes and pulling them over his waist.

Phil does the same and they sit across from one another in silence until Dan decides to say something.

“Sorry.”

Phil looks up at him. “Don’t be. You don’t have to be sorry,” he frown. It’s sincere and warm and makes Dan want to just cry and curl up beside him.

He sniffs wetly.

Time seems to stretch into something thin and light like running honey before Dan is able to speak the words heavy on his tongue.

“It felt weird,” he tells him. His voice feels too loud and too big for such a quiet room, but he reminds himself once more that it is only Phil here. Just Phil, that will understand and listen like he is now.

“Did you hate all of it?” Phil asks, voice a touch insecure.

Dan shakes his head. “No,” he tells him. “At first it was good, but then when it came down to… to doing it, it just felt not great.”

Phil swallows and then nods. “Did it hurt?”

Dan imagines the pile up of questions that are probably stacked up inside Phil’s brain as he sits here and wonders where it went wrong. All Dan can do is answer them honestly and do his best to quell his bubbling anxiety.

“Not really,” he shrugs as he looks down at his lap. “The ropes were alright, I think in the end I just kinda…” he trails off. He takes a few deep breaths before he finds the courage to look back up and see Dan staring back at him with a conceded look.

“Panicked?” He finishes for him.

Dan purses his lips together. “Maybe. It just felt weird. Maybe I just didn't like not being able to see you.”

Phil looks down and away and nods, taking it all in as he chews on his bottom lip absentmindedly.

There’s silence again before Phil speaks again.

“Do you think we should have spoken more, like… verbal communication or something?”

Dan can tell he’s already starting to spiral into a state of uncertainty, and so he shuffles over to him until their knees are touching, taking his hands in his.

“It’s not your fault,” Dan tells him, looking deep into his worried looking eyes. “It just. Didn’t work out, yeah?”

His Adam apple bobs as he swallows before he nods slowly. “Yeah,” he whispers. “You’re right.”

Dan manages to find himself smiling, making Phil smile back too.

“And it doesn’t matter, alright?” He says whilst giving his hands a squeeze. “We tried it, gave it a go and it just wasn’t for us. And that’s fine.”

Phil nods.

“It’s like… like your Bob Ross painting,” Dan teases lightly and Phil actually laughs at that.

“Hey!” He laughs. “Don’t be mean to me!”

Dan snorts a laugh before he falls back on the bed, pulling Phil down with him with a soft  _ oof _ as they land against the softness of the mattress.

They lay there for a while, skin to skin before Dan reaches up and touches at Phil’s face, finger tracing across all the lines and places he knows so well.

Because he knows Phil so well. He knows what he likes and what works best for them.

They like fucking on their backs because it’s easy and kinder to their joints and they plan when they have sex because Phil has to wash and dry the towel that they like because it’s softer on naked skin.

Trying new things with Phil is always interesting and daunting and whilst it’s fun and new, he knows that the things they like are the things they’ll most likely stick to.

He hums a laugh and Phil looks at him.

“What?” He asks, voice croaky and sleepy.

“I kinda felt like one of those roast pigs when you tied me up and put that gag in my mouth,” he smiles, laughing again at his own joke.

Phil stares at him before he makes a face and tries to push Dan away with no real effort.

“You’re so dumb,” he mutters.

Dan hums. “ _ We’re  _ so dumb.”

He feels Phil kiss at his naked shoulder and it radiates love.

“You okay?” He asks quietly.

Dan looks at him. “Yeah,” he whispers. “Are you?”

Phil nods. “I am now.”

Then, he says,

“I love you, you know.”

Dan grins. He suddenly feels tired, and whilst the sheets are dirty and sweaty and all he wants is a bath later on with maybe some bubbles and a pizza and a movie, he might just fall asleep here for a while, wrapped up in Phil just the way he knows will help him doze off into something comfortable.

He leans forward and kisses his nose.

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday jane !! i hope your day is as incredible as you are <3


End file.
